October 15, 2023

    I am probably subjective in my outlooks to the world, to understanding our humanity, and attempting to have a positive outlook. That's a mouthful! Granted that our attempts to achieve a peaceful existence full of potential and choices with freedom and dignity are besmirched with the news headlines reporting the opposite around the world. Fighters with evil intent to cause horrific suffering very similar to Nazi behaviors of our past is happening now! The conflicts of the Middle East continues with propaganda and analyses attempting to explain how this has come about. Our ability to govern ourselves in question with Israel politics now so familiar to us with our own governance in disarray.

    Yesterday in a challenging hike up the ridges and valleys of Kahuku Oahu I thought I had an insight. We were climbing then descending some steep inclines and one more challenged hiker was getting in shape after being absent from hiking for a number of months. We assisted him mostly down the more challenging sections both enjoying our challenges and attempting to make sure we had a successful hike rather than a fall with injuries. So what's the insight? Subjective reasoning again, I think there are some people who would not enjoy assisting another would see the challenged hiker as a hindrance to their enjoyment of the trail. Oh, no you may exclaim! Well I partly agree that most of the people I associate with would find the assisting necessary and agreeable to them but there is a minority who would not. How much of a minority? I think substantial. How else can we understand how significant groups endorse gerrymandering, racial exclusions, resistance to assisting those in poverty, maybe homeless and impaired? Our congress may be influenced by this type of minority that will use any means to create chaos and dysfunction to prevent democracy from functioning! Am I taking too big a leep from some impressions I had while hiking or maybe there is a kernel of understanding I'm attempting to be aware of. 

While hiking one of our participants who knows the words and songs of folk singers mention Bob Dylon's song 

My Back Pages
Song by Bob Dylan


Crimson flames tied through my ears, rollin' high and mighty traps
Pounced with fire on flaming roads using ideas as my maps
"We'll meet on edges, soon, " said I, proud 'neath heated brow
Ah, but I was so much older then, I'm younger than that now
Half-wracked prejudice leaped forth, "rip down all hate, " I screamed
Lies that life is black and white spoke from my skull, I dreamed
Romantic facts of musketeers foundationed deep, somehow
Ah, but I was so much older then, I'm younger than that now
Girls' faces formed the forward path from phony jealousy
To memorizing politics of ancient history
Flung down by corpse evangelists, unthought of, though somehow
Ah, but I was so much older then. I'm younger than that now
A self-ordained professor's tongue too serious to fool
Spouted out that liberty is just equality in school
"Equality, " I spoke the word as if a wedding vow
Ah, but I was so much older then, I'm younger than that now
In a soldier's stance, I aimed my hand at the mongrel dogs who teach
Fearing not that I'd become my enemy in the instant that I preach
My existence led by confusion boats, mutiny from stern to bow
Ah, but I was so much older then, I'm younger than that now
Yes, my guard stood hard when abstract threats too noble to neglect
Deceived me into thinking I had something to protect
Good and bad, I define these terms quite clear, no doubt, somehow
Ah, but I was so much older then I'm younger than that now
Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Bob Dylan
https://www.google.com/search?q=my+back+pages+lyrics&newwindow=1&sca_esv=573681836&sxsrf=AM9HkKl-GqBzRsD-fqR8t-4BPV239ggMtA%3A1697426906049&ei=2q0sZdHUAp-i0PEPs7m6-Ac&oq=my+back+pages+bon+dylan&gs_lp=Egxnd3Mtd2l6LXNlcnAiF215IGJhY2sgcGFnZXMgYm9uIGR5bGFuKgIIADIKEAAYRxjWBBiwAzIKEAAYRxjWBBiwAzIKEAAYRxjWBBiwAzIKEAAYRxjWBBiwAzIKEAAYRxjWBBiwAzIKEAAYRxjWBBiwAzIKEAAYRxjWBBiwAzIKEAAYRxjWBBiwA0iQFlAAWABwAXgBkAEAmAEAoAEAqgEAuAEByAEA4gMEGAAgQYgGAZAGCA&sclient=gws-wiz-serp
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rGEIMCWob3U
The refrain "Ah, but I was so much older then, I'm younger than that now" 
represents Dylan insight that his past wisdom in his songs and life may now have 
to be reexamined. So here we are again sometimes in a dialogue or group 
discussion talking maybe heated points of view to argue and influence the others to
accept our point of view and later maybe sooner or later in life we change our 
minds! Yes wisdom, I knowing that change will occur and being wrong can be 
instructive so we don't repeat the same mistakes. However, again I come back to 
my point of view today that there are a significant minority of people in all 
societies that cannot see this at all. They are right and righteous and therefore be 
damned the rest of us!
The linked article gives some explanation of some of the lyrics.
So here is
Theory of Memory
    "Long, long ago, before I was a tormented artist, afflicted with longing yet
incapable of forming durable attachments, long before this, I was a glorious
ruler uniting all of a divided country—so I was told by the fortune-teller
who examined my palm. Great things, she said, are ahead of you, or perhaps
behind you; it is difficult to be sure. And yet, she added, what is the difference?
Right now you are a child holding hands with a fortune-teller. All the
rest is hypothesis and dream."
    Just spend some time thinking and appreciating this short poem on how we live.

SIREN
"Before that I was a waitress.
I wanted to marry you, I wanted
your wife to suffer.
in which all the parts are sad parts.
think this way?  I deserve
Everything was clear to me:
that proved she didn’t love you.
if she loved you
wouldn’t she want you to be happy?
if I felt less I would be
a better person.  I was
a good waitress.
I could carry eight drinks.
Last night I saw a woman sitting in a dark bus-
in the dream, she’s weeping, the bus she’s on
is moving away.  With one hand
she’s waving; the other strokes
an egg carton full of babies."

Our life narrative here dissected and changed with a parting bus ride.
The dream doesn’t rescue the maiden. Strong feelings, longings, and delusions are described.

Matins, By LOUISE GLUCK
L.A. TIMES ARCHIVES
Louise Glück
"You want to know how I spend my time?
I walk the front lawn, pretending
to be weeding. You ought to know
I’m never weeding, on my knees, pulling
clumps of clover from the flower beds: in fact
I’m looking for courage, for some evidence
my life will change, though
it takes forever, checking
each clump for the symbolic
leaf, and soon the summer is ending, already
the leaves turning, always the sick trees
going first, the dying turning
brilliant yellow, while a few dark birds perform
their curfew of music. You want to see my hands?
As empty now as at the first note.
Or was the point always
to continue without a sign?"

Have you ever looked for courage, for some evidence that your life has changed 
or do we continue without a sign?

"Theory of Memory" by Louise Glück, from Faithful and Virtuous Night. © Farrar, Straus and Giroux, 2014. Reprinted with permission. https://writersalmanac.publicradio.org/index.php%3Fdate=2014%252F11%252F11.html

 

and

"I see it is with you as with the birches:

I am not to speak to you

in the personal way. Much

has passed between us. Or

was it always only

on the one side? I am

at fault, at fault, I asked you

to be human--I am no needier

than other people. But the absence

of all feeling, of the least

concern for me--I might as well go on

addressing the birches,

as in my former life: let them

do their worst, let them

bury me with the Romantics,

their pointed yellow leaves

falling and covering me."

From “The Wild Iris” (Ecco: $19.95; 63 pp.).

1992 by Louise Gluck. Reprinted by permission . These are austere, spare poems, set in chilly winter weather. https://www.latimes.com/archives/la-xpm-1992-09-20-bk-1677-story.html

Sadness should we bury you with the Romantics?

and finally 

Nostos

"There was an apple tree in the yard—
this would have been
forty years ago—behind,
only meadows. Drifts
of crocus in the damp grass.
I stood at that window:
late April. Spring
flowers in the neighbor’s yard.
How many times, really, did the tree
flower on my birthday,
the exact day, not
before, not after? Substitution
of the immutable
for the shifting, the evolving.
Substitution of the image
for relentless earth. What
do I know of this place,
the role of the tree for decades
taken by a bonsai, voices
rising from the tennis courts—
Fields. Smell of the tall grass, new cut.
As one expects of a lyric poet.
We look at the world once, in childhood.
The rest is memory."

Do you agree with the last two stanzas?

https://readalittlepoetry.com/2005/11/01/nostos-by-louise-gluck/

    Recently I read an article about the controversies at Stanford University in 
which the author describes how bias and discrimination over the recent massacre 
by Hamas was incorporated in the discussions and comments of the students and 
professors. Instead of dialogue and clarity both some of the students and faculty
behaved with biased rancor. My take is that universities can be a place to be critical and
thoughtful and a place to attempt to magnify and take sides with attempts to vilify
and discriminate. They do represent our social disarray.

    I'm not fast with my hands on the piano when attempting to plays some of the 
barrelhouse blues my renditions are slower. The heritage of these blues from the 
barrel house is so American and innovative. In the countryside of the south back 
when people mostly of color got some lumber boards and built a barrelhouse, put 
piano in it and invited the artist who performed sometimes on dirt floors while 
others drank and danced. The term 'barrelhouse' derives from the cheap bars or 
'juke joints' of the rural South where African-American labourers gathered to drink 
and dance at the edge of small towns and levee camps.The gems are now our 
heritage! So I'm a humble student attempting to learn the glissando (slide up or 
down on the keyboard) rapid bogeys notes and rhythms'. While in the throws of 
these sessions I'm not here with all of what I was thinking 


Leonard



    













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